The Renewing of My Mind...and stuff

I think it's always valuable to review the past in a ways that ask, "What has God done here," or, "How was God in this or that?"

Thursday I visited the offices of a friend, "T.J." He's a fellow counseling professional in Lakewood, CO. Initially there was a lot of stuff associated with our relationship. That early "stuff" was all very professional and academic. He was a supervisor while I was at Adams Community Mental Health (1994-'95) where I was completing my PhD's clinical internship requirements. But then after I left the Adams County team he had become a valuable friend and part of my client-referral network. (It's the network I disbanded when I left private practice through 2006-07.)

T.J. asked me to come, see his great new office suite, and meet some of his prized fellow staff members. So, there I was. In the conversations and sharing that punctuated my visit, he asked me to review some of my professional experiences. Specifically, he wanted me to rehears some of the professional roles and experiences that contribute to my effectiveness with couples and families (since we're considering practical ways we can be more collaborative and creatively effective.) As it turned out that was very interesting....hmmm!

Just for clarification, this was an entirely secular setting, albeit a friendly one. In my rehearsal of those roles and experiences I was purposefully trying to be professional and familiar--since we were all "friends"--and I was also trying to be consciously sensitive to "the little voice" inside (1Kings 19:12-13; 1Peter 3:15; Psalm 42:7). The little voice was saying, "Dick, listen to yourself carefully!

I think it's interesting how we remember things. Our memories of circumstances or events are influenced by both what was going on for us emotionally at the time and the by general content and detail of those events. It's similar to the way the Dewey Decimal System's letters and numbers route and identify the placement of a library book on a library's shelves. Our memories are stored in our mental library according to their emotional impact and their general content. Perhaps it's no surprise that the emotional influence of the events at the time, not so much the content, becomes the decisive factor to "where and how this memory will be placed" on our mind's library shelves.

Scripture challenges God's people to regularly review and to praise God--no matter what--for the events and circumstances of their lives (e.g., Philippians 4:4-9). Interestingly, too, God's people are challenged to do this often as a community (Psalm 147 & 150; Ephesians 5:18-20). Why? I believe, in part, it's because people remember things differently. For example, I may remember something and attribute great discomfort or outright pain to it. However, people who were around me at the time may, in fact, remember the same event quite differently. Their perspective can bring an entirely different and potentially more positive "twist" to what was so painful for me. Their perspective can--IF I LET IT--have a positive and uplifting influence on my initial memory. Their perspective can help me appraise the events initial impact on me and how it can be re-shelved, now, in my memory's library. WOW!!!

As I drove away from T.J.'s office Thursday I realized I had a different and developing new perspective on some events associated with my pre-doctoral life. For me those events have been remembered as four very uncomfortable years. But right now the IMPLICATIONS of that great discomfort is being challenged--and interestingly changed!! I can "feel" them doing a metamorphosis (Romans 12: 1,2) even as I am writing this. Surprisingly, in this instance for me, it was the "little voice" that prompted the change; T.J. and his team had little or nothing to do with. The challenge to "Listen!" to myself and to consciously rehearse the details is re-editing how it feels, right now, and the way it it's being shelved, right now, on my mind's library shelves. Hmmm again.

Someone has said, "The same sun that softens butter hardens clay." Obviously the difference is in the oil. Oil is often associated in scripture with the influence of the Spirit of God and one's response to HIM. Perhaps we could re-write that little quote to say, "The same SON whose influence softens the hearts of some men hardens the hearts of others."

Oh God, may I continually be found among those who are softened by life's circumstances! Amen?